The Roast of Katie Stone

I’ve built my brand on being so sweet and docile, I’m worried no one will ever roast me! So I’ve taken on the challenge myself.

Katie Stone is SO shrill…
How shrill is she!?
Katie Stone is SO shrill, she broke the glass ceiling just with the sound of her voice.

Katie Stone is SO bossy…
How bossy is she!?
Katie Stone is SO bossy when Kelis met her she said “FUCK I TAKE IT ALL BACK!”

Katie Stone has fucked SO MANY comics…
How many comics!?
Katie Stone has fucked SO MANY comics, when Garfield sees her coming he girds his loins.

Katie Stone’s feminist premises are SO tired…
How tired are they!?
Katie Stone’s feminist premises are SO tired, they can’t even make it out of bed for a 1 PM girl power brunch.

Katie Stone is SO high strung…
How high strung is she?!
Katie Stone is so high strung, when she speaks dogs wonder why they’re being punished.

Katie Stone is SO unfunny..
How unfunny is she!?
Katie Stone is so unfunny, her first stand up special will be aired on CSPAN.

Katie Stone’s Social Justice Warrior act is SO exhausting…
How exhausting is it!?
Katie Stone’s SJW act is SO exhausting the staff at Jezebel has to take a nap every time she’s retweeted.

Katie Stone is SO uptight…
How uptight is she!?
Katie Stone is SO uptight, the only diamond she’ll be getting in her 20’s is if someone puts coal in her asshole.

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